Dear Jesus

I'm so angry!  Seeing my family hurt breaks my heart. Yet there is nothing I can do. It is out of my hands and into yours. Your very capable hands. Your loving, compassionate, nail-scarred hands. And I rest in You.

You love me. You want the best for me. You work for my good. You hold me, keep me, comfort me. And I rest in You.

And then, I'm angry again! You remind me to shine your love, show forgiveness, hope in You. So I do. And I rest in You.

The day inches along. One thing and then the next upsets me and I forget whose I am and who holds the future. You remind me, ever so gently, that you've got this. And I rest in You.

Quiet my spirit, dear Jesus. Let me hear your voice and see through your eyes. Let me continually rest in You.

Amen

#GiveGodTheGlory #HolyBeautiful #HolyBeautifulPrayers #RestInYou

A Prayer of Worship

O God! My God! Creator of the universe. sustainer of life. How can mere words express who you are? There is no God like you.

You deserve all Honor and Praise for I am nothing without you. You alone formed the heavens, the sun, the moon, the stars.

Only by Your power, the sun shines brightly day by day (even tho clouds may hide it from my sight). It brings light and warmth and changing seasons by Your command. The moon circling the earth waxes and wanes by Your design. The stars, sparkling pinpoints of light, hang in the vast and unfathomable night sky.

All Creatures from the invisible to giants are by Your command and plants of all kinds provide beauty and sustenance.

And then You made man -- You made me! Before You began on all creation, You had a plan for me! You created me, gave me life and watched over me as I grew and matured. You kept me (and you still do!) when I wandered from your path for me. You loved me with an everlasting love. you are my strength and shield; my ever present help. You alone keep me safe, hold my family, and fight battles I don't even know are coming.

You saved my soul from destruction and led me to Your side. You, O Lord, see my every move, know my every thought, and provided for my every need. I trust you to welcome me into eternity for you ALWAYS keep your promises. And you have promised to love me forever since I believe and follow Jesus. For His sake you have cleansed me; by His blood I am healed; by His name I call on You. You gave your son to ransom and redeem How can you love me so much?

You alone are worthy of all creation singing, "Holy! Holy! Holy!"
You alone are worthy of all honor & glory & praise.
You alone are the Lord God Almighty.
There is no God like you!

Amen
#GiveGodTheGlory #HolyBeautiful #HolyBeautifulPrayers

Look How Far I've Come

I am:

The new kid in class
The shy, quiet girl
The last one chosen
The child of divorce
The self-conscious, low self-esteem teenager
The insecure, the unsure
The unaware and naïve
The new bride laying aside any dreams of her own, wanting to please.
No opinion of her own, waiting to hear then follow
The young mother - not ready
The stay at home mom
The taxi driver to practices and games
The fan, so proud
The woman alone, a trucker’s wife
The embarrassed
The lonely
The afraid
The farmer’s wife
The grandmother. Oh, my precious ones!
The depressed, burdened, broken
The new face, alone in the crowd
The crying one, trying to find Him
The seeker, looking to survive and serve
The healing one, learning to live again.
New friends, encouraging
The brave one, trying new things
Stretching, sharing, speaking
Learning to be the leader
The sick one, fighting to be strong, not wanting to be a burden
The follower of Jesus
The over-comer through the Holy Spirit
The worshiper, full of praise and gratitude
The waiting one, waiting for the Lord’s return.

Look how far I’ve come.

New Year, 2014

HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2014

We are all well here. Christmas packages opened, toys scattered, and family came and went. We laughed and hugged and loved on one another. Then we ate too much and promised ourselves we would do better later.

Now life returns to what is normal for us.


As always, when the year winds to a close, I remember times from the past. I laugh (or cry) and look forward to what comes next.


I gave up New Year's Resolutions a long time ago and have instead tried to adopt a word or phrase to focus on each year. I think this year God is leading me to the phrase, "Do it all for the glory of the God." Which means to test all my attitudes, my conduct, every aspect of my life by whether or not it shows the character of God and brings Him honor. This is true Worship. If I live daily practicing this concept, I will truly worship Him.

May 2014 be full of joy for our family and may each one of us individually see the blessings and gifts that God rains down on us daily.

Merry Christmas, 2013

Christmas Day, 2013 is about over.

The sun has set and dark is deepening. Temperatures are falling and the drip, drip, dripping of melting ice has ceased for now.

The children are winding down ~~ just a little ~~ as they enjoy the cousins and play with new toys. Soon they will tire and will be ready for bed. They won't want to go, of course, but mommas everywhere will insist it is time and tuck them snugly into bed.

The quiet here today broken only by telephone rings and message alerts with Merry Christmas!! from the other end.

Did I celebrate the birth? Did I praise and worship? Did I pause in awe at the miraculous gift given? I'm afraid I didn't give deep contemplation or gratitude for the great and awesome love God showed by sending His son to earth. I didn't ruminate on His message or mission. I kind of skimmed over it while cooking and doing the regular things of the day.

Every year, at this season, I think I will center more on the Christ Child. I will love more. I will give more. I will praise more. I will tell the story more. Yet each year, the day closes and I have missed the mark. I am a little off center.

This is my penance. To confess my failings to you. To ask forgiveness again for my "good intentions" that never seem to fully materialize.

So. I begin again. Each day my goal to spend time with the Word and in the Word. Each day to focus on the miraculous fact that Jesus loves me; to concentrate and praise the Awesome Holy God and give thanks each moment as I practice living in His presence. Maybe then I will keep Christmas Season holy. If I keep Christmas in my heart throughout the year.

Merry Christmas! And may you recognize God's blessings as they rain down on you each day in the New Year.

It's Cold Outside!!

Winter weather arrived at my house this week. And I am wishing I lived in the tropics!!

This is the scene from my front porch this morning. A bone-chilling 15 degrees, 4 inches of snow and more to come.

I'll be house-bound until who knows when so I'm warming the chicken noodle soup I made from my sister's super secret, super easy recipe. And I think a cup of tea would just hit the spot.

The grandsons are VERY excited by all this snow and are looking forward to building snowmen and playing with their Dad. I plan to watch from my window and cheer them on.

Today will be a good day to sit with an engrossing book and catch up on some reading or get a new sewing project started or look through my patterns for some inspiration, or search cookbooks for a new recipe to try. Cooking will keep me warm! If I don't have something to keep me busy, I'll feel guilty for not doing anything productive. Can't have that these days. That leads to depression and Trouble.

Even though I am not a big fan of Winter Weather, I see God's beauty in the mounds and drifts.. It is quite lovely to watch the flakes falling, swirling and dancing. Even the ice patterns in the puddles and pond are intriguingly lovely to see. The moisture on fields will be welcomed by all who farm (even though it means extra work, more feed, and breaking ice). When I look at it that way, Winter is a blessing. But, then . . . everything is a blessing.

The seasons come and go. Days shorten and lengthen. Only God is always the same. Always here. Always Good.

Dream Big

I'm dreaming big today.

I'm dreaming of what I think God may be calling me to do.

But ~~ Why is there always a "but"? ~~ do I trust what I think I am hearing. I know I trust the Lord. I am quite convinced He is able. My questioning heart asks, "But am I?" Am I able? Am I ready?Am I strong and courageous?

Then the answers comes. No, I am not able, or ready, or strong and definitely not courageous . I don't have to be those things because HE is. All I need to do is do the one small step at a time. Then all those small steps will add up to the Dream Big He is giving me.

Then I hear the whisper:

Don't be afraid to

DREAM BIG

And trust God to lead you step by step on the right path. . .

Foggy morning

The fields are all foggy.

I am unable to see the sun or the sky or any good thing.

But wait! The sun, as it rises, causes the veil of mist to rise, to evaporate. The light and heat bring clearing ~ clarity in the air so I may see.

The light shines through chasing the dark away. No more shadow nor confusion. All is open.

The Light shines through exposing the sin and bringing healing.

Listen. Hear the birds begin to sing. Hear the breeze start to whisper.
All creation begins to sing praise to the Creator.

I bow to worship also.

Changing Seasons

Have you looked outside? The fall colors are fabulous here! Everywhere I look I see change. From the trees, to the grass, to the animals, to the rising sun, to the children growing.

Changing from summer to fall

All things change.

Ecclesiastes 1:4-7~ Generations come and generations go, but the earth remains forever. The sun rises and the sun sets, and hurries back to where it rises. The wind blows to the south and turns to the north; round and round it goes, ever returning on its course. All streams flow into the sea, yet the sea is never full. To the place the streams come from, there they return again.

All things change.

Ecclesiastes 3:1, 11~ There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven; He has made everything beautiful in its time. 

All things change. Except. . . God.

Malachi 3:6 ~ I the Lord do not change. 

James 1:17 ~ Every good and perfect gift is from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. 

I am so glad that God is always the same. Always sees me, always knows me, always loves me, always cares for me, always guides me, always forgives me. And, he always brings change into my life. He is changing me into a more Christ like me.

All things change.

1 Corinthians 15:51-52 ~ Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed -- in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed.

I am so thankful that I will change when Christ comes to take me home. I want to be found working for him, serving him, resting in him.

All things change.

Aren't you glad they do?

What do I See?

I've been watching from my window. What do I see?

I see small boys jumping on a trampoline. I see smiling faces and hear laughter. Shouts, full of childish joy, fill the air. I see the black cloth stretch with each step and bounce. I see the silver steel sparkle as the leaves blow and let the sun reflect, however briefly.

I see Momma and Daddy laughing with boys. I see her sharp intake of breath with the Young One falls. He's so light he can't stand when the Brother walks across the net-like surface.

I see those boys run circles, fall and roll. I see them jump up laughing and try again.

I see the Brother, later in the day, look with longing out the window and hear him ask if he can go play again. But, it is supper time and getting darker and colder. So the answer must be no. But maybe tomorrow. I see disappointment flash across his face.

I see the smile quickly fade as a frown and quivering lip take its place.

I see me in that face. 

I see me wanting what I want, when I want it. Not satisfied to wait for a better time. Not trusting my Father to know what is best for me. 

I see my lip quiver. I see me plant my feet and prepare to argue, maybe even cry and plead to get what I want, when I want.

I see me as a child again, resisting the "No." Will I ever learn? Will I ever just say, "Yes, Father. Whatever you say ."?

I see me watch the eastern sky, waiting for Christ's return. I wait impatiently. Expectantly. Hopefully.

I see (at least, I hope someday to see) Jesus split the sky and come back to this earth. Then, oh then,  I see every knee bow to his Lordship. And I see me rising to meet him.

Oh, glorious day!!

Morning Sun

I watched the sun come up this morning. Rising bit by bit over the hill until it fully filled the morning sky. Its light so powerful and bright I could not look at it full on but had to shade my eyes from the brilliance

I think when I see Jesus in heaven it will be a little like that. The light of his glory will fill the air. His goodness and love will burst forth as the rays of the sun and I will cover my face. I'm afraid I will be ashamed of myself in his presence. His light will reveal all my flaws. He will see all my failures, all the times I wanted to please him or intended to obey, but then I didn't.

Or maybe it will be like the summer afternoon sun and I will lift my face and spread my arms wide and welcome the warmth and light. Then I will dance in delight at the nearness of him and because of the wonder of his love for me. And I will worship him. Forever. 

I am so grateful that I am already forgiven. When I believed on Jesus for the salvation of my soul, he washed all the sin of my life away. Each morning, just as the sun rises and sheds light on the dark world, Jesus sheds his light on the darkness of my soul and I am renewed. I can begin again. 

And I worship him.

A March Birthday

How do I describe my younger son? 

Physically: Tall, blond with blue eyes, artistic hands and a quiet manner. He is a cowboy from the old west. 

Socially: Quiet, friendly, married and a daddy. He is a cowboy.

Likes: Horses, cows, dogs, tractors, camping, guns, trail rides; being the "cool uncle". He is a cowboy.

Dislikes: being still, crowds, lazy people and messy places. He's a cowboy.

He loves God, his family, and helping others. He works hard, gives generously and asks for little. He is a cowboy.


My son had a birthday this month (March). That reminded me of all the birthdays of his growing up years. We would have family and friends come by for cake (usually decorated with horses and cowboys) and ice cream. Some times it would snow; sometimes it would be sunny and warm. Whatever the weather, whatever the party, whoever might be there he remained the same. He is a cowboy.

PS: I started this in March but couldn't finish it until now.It's only a little late.